Introducing the Allergist

I went to the allergist today. After signing about 11 pages (none of which I barely remember) I sat down and pretended as hard as I could that I wasn’t itching. After like 10 minutes of shaking my leg and fidgeting in my seat, I gave in, pulled my claws out and went to work. After a couple minutes of relief one lady started looking at me. Irritated at the entire situation I just wanted to yell at her to mind her business. I’M NOT DIRTY OR ASHY… something is going on. I sat for another 20 minutes trying to be more discrete about my itching problem.

“Miss Prat!” SIGH. They never get my name right.

I go back and they do the normal: blood pressure and weight. Then they take ya to the room where you WAIT again. I was ready to take a nap by the time the doctor came in. So doc is a tall, lanky, older man with some extreme bush action in the eyebrow area. The only reason I mentioned this was because I had to train my eyes during the first half of his visit not to look up at them. The hair on his head was thinning but not those eyebrows. Ok… back on track.

We talk for a bit and then he starts checking everything out. “Take a deep breath in for me”. I breathe in deep. “Ummm… take a deep breath in for me”. I did it again. “You’re not putting out”. I bust out laughing. Really, you say!!! Sometimes the bad girl just pops up out of no where. Back on track… they put me on the blow-out-as-many-candles-as-you-can-in-one-breath machine and after three attempts, just like that, I’m asthmatic. Can I say here that I was mad at the machine? With my birthday fast approaching I just imagined these were real candles on my favorite cake. I saw family and presents surrounding me. SMILE. I thought I would blow out all the dern candles and that would be it. NO. I was disappointed in myself. Can I try again please????!!!

After a lot more dialogue and questions galore I left the office with a handful of prescriptions, a few concerns, an appointment to get my thyroid checked and an appointment for a skin test. Oh yeah and some pretty good nasal spray; better than the one my PO gave me. Anyway… let’s back up. Why the thyroid check-up? I was getting so much instruction and information that I forgot to ask that question. I really just wanted to get out of there so I could get those drugs in my system. And hooray for small victories because they are dissolving as I type. So we'll see what happens. I just want to be itch-free.